WOW

This week went by wicked fast, I can't believe it's Friday already! And you know we all love Friday! Really even if it is not the end to your work week, you know you love it, don't deny it, denial is ugly.

Anyway, two fantastic things happened this week, one was mind-blowingly fun and the other weird and interesting.

Shatner would want to hear about the weird so I'll start there. If you have been paying attention you will have noticed that I take medications and go to therapy regularly. However in my quest for personal wellness that just isn't enough for me. I challenge myself to face the dark and scary parts of my being head on. There is no running away. There is only dealing with it no matter how difficult it is to do so. To tell you the truth I've never understood avoiding problems (even though I've done it) because they will only be there waiting for you, they don't just go away on their own. In fact I think they get bigger every time you turn your back on them. Just sayin. But anyhow, yesterday I went for a Matrix treatment. If you are unfamiliar, no worries, read THIS.
I know it's a lot to take in isn't it. But get this! As hokum as it sounds....stuff actually happened. No fricking joke. Now I've had REIKI before and thought that was cool. Matrix has similar effects but there's more to it. My whole body reacted in shivering, numbness, heaviness and crying. I felt quite relaxed and happy afterward and can't wait to see what subtle changes will occur in the coming weeks.

This past Monday, being that it was a holiday and all, I didn't have to go to group so there was no installment of 'Mental Mondays'. There was no installment of anything because I went to Toronto with a couple of hot bitches to a kick ass Industrial concert instead!!!
We made friends before we even got in the doors. I noticed the guy ahead of us in line had his zipper down. Now I have a history of noticing open trap doors thanks to the Ex, so don't go thinking I'm out there checking out every guy's junk, okay? Anyway my friend Lori decided to inform him of his situation and that cemented our fourth in our group for the evening. He was nice enough to give us a free ticket for the concert even.
The bands that were playing were Cyanotic, mind.in.a.box (which now I think is ironic since I've been told to think outside the box and was there exploring things which gave me pleasure) and Front Line Assembly. There were also two DJs, {iVardensphere} (which I didn't much care for) and DJ?ACUCRACK. One word there....awesome. Look them up, you won't regret it.

The music was fantastic! I met lots of people. I befriended a cool young man. I even met band members. (Gave one of them a back rub in fact hubba hubba) And I was dancing for almost seven hours, without complaint Lori and Gina! At one point I gathered little Lori up in my arms and danced so she could still dance without having to use her own feet. Awww. I had a great time with two cool chicks. Turns out that I'm awesome in big cities as well as the small ones. No need to be jealous, anyone can achieve awesomeness.

Great things to come

What brave new me will come next?

Because Sam wants it....

I have an overwhelming need to explain that I am not an artist but I enjoy the act of putting paint to canvas. If I never become good at painting, that's fine, I will accept that but I will still continue painting regardless. I love colour. I love shapes. I love abstract.

I decided to paint something for a friend and her husband. Hers was a belated birthday present and his a birthday present. I also wanted them to be a kind of set. So here they are....

The female of the set for my friend...

And for her husband I painted my interpretation of what a guitar looks like when you strum it. He loves guitars...

So it is what it is....

Poetry Wednesday. Oh yeah!

This week's poem I dedicate to all the women out there that are not cut out from a magazine or from a Hollywood movie. There is a long history of us women being told what is beautiful and what is not beautiful and trying to fit in to those size zero molds. We find ourselves buying pills, lotions and potions, new this, new that and improved whatevers just to reach someone else's idea of wonderful. And stupid us have believed it! Hook, line and sinker!! Well I for one have witnessed the power of inner confidence and how that confidence turns into magnetism and how that magnetism has made me not only happy but very fun and very, very popular.  Each and every one of us has the power of awesome within. We don't need to be thin. We don't need to be pretty. We don't need to have a magazine or a man to validate or define us. We only need ourselves.

Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I'm a Party Villian

The last time I posted was Friday! It's Tuesday!! This weekend has been a bit of a blur.

So have the last few weeks for that matter.

My life in fact is gaining velocity.

So when I was taking a breather today with the Kid, watching a cartoon movie and chowing down on some za, it hit me. This new found version of myself, this wonderful surprising unveiling of me that has been so long in coming, has an awesome new name. It describes my awesomeness and appetite for massive fun perfectly.

I'm committing awesomeness with both direction and magnitude! Oh yeah!!

Say YES to giving your own life some direction and magnitude!

Jump! Jump! Jump!

This past Wednesday I joined a friend at a group meditation. It was a surprisingly large group and I was quite excited to be in attendance. It became even more exciting when I found out there was a Deep Trance Medium there that was going to channel some spirits and answer questions to a select few. Well the meditation didn't pan out so well for me because a had a blasted cough attack halfway through.

But here's the most awesome part!

Let's put aside meeting lovely people and being part of something special on it's first night and trying new things, sure those things are all great. But it was time for the channeling and I had my name in the box to possibly be picked to ask a question. I patiently sat there listening to the other people's questions and the responses that were given. And the whole time repeating in my head 'Pick me next' 'Pick me next' 'Pick me next'. And you know what happened?? I got picked next!!! My question for the Medium was "What is supposed to be my passion in life?". (Or something like that because I can't actually remember how I worded it.) Anyhow, here is a brief synopsis of what I was told...

I have to start thinking outside the box. I have to experiment and do whatever gives me pleasure. I have to take that jump. She pointed out that currently my creative passion is writing.

Writing people. There was other stuff too but I don't remember exactly what it was. I only remember being wowed and feeling that I was right on track with that part of my life. Even the wording she used like 'jump' had meaning since it was what I was talking to my friend about only days earlier. It was a truly amazing experience.
So the next day I went out and got some more painting supplies. And today I deemed my dining room as the 'Art Studio'.
The Universe has been talking to me lately. It's been a good conversation so far. So if the Universe says 'Jump' I will respond with 'How high?'.
I have always lived in fear but that's not really living now is it? The Universe wants me to think outside the box...so be it. MY question is 'Will the Universe be able to handle me?'.

Be courageous.

It's one of the 

only places left

uncrowded.

                            Anita Roddick

 Say YES to jumping!

Nope, not today

I've been coughing for almost three days straight after having a bitch of a sore throat for the past week and a half. I have not slept properly for days because of the pain and discomfort of the sore throat and the top of my head having come clean off with the coughing. I had a really cool night last night but am too tired and too fed up to share it right now. But I'm still uber awesome. I'm always awesome.

And speaking of awesome....

If you got some, smoke it. Or do another shooter. Or take a hit of something. Sit back. Relax.
And watch...

Yes that just happened.