Time to get back on the wagon...All Aboard

Thanks to my wonderful illnesses I am needy, unsure, distracted and impulsive. So I get easily hooked on something (even if it is damaging to me) because it feels good at the time and I neglect my responsibilities (like the poor old blog here) and then I feel bad about it... I almost feel like a recovering addict that has slipped up and needs to start fresh once again the morning after.
So here I am having gotten off track from the 'Ultimate Plan for Awesomeness' and I am suffering hard core because of it. Mental illness is a bitch people, a serious bitch. And if you don't stick to the plan and keep on top of things, it will become a life or death situation....it's like watching a train speeding down the tracks bearing down on you and the whole time you're telling yourself "I've been here before. I'll jump out of the way in time." But you don't and you get creamed by the train only to tell yourself in retrospect that you should have known better than to stand on the tracks in the first place.

There are a few trains in my life, there's probably always going to be trains in my life and it's okay for them to be there...but I that doesn't mean I have to stand on the tracks waiting to get creamed.

Say YES to sidestepping the train wreck.

How about a little common courtesy, bitch??

WARNING

This post contains cursing! Like a lot! Really a lot...

I am not perfect. I am not always kind or considerate. I am not compassionate. I have road rage. And I don't like children.

I do, however, say please. And, get this, I say thank you too. I usually follow the rules. And I know how to share.

I am one of the crustiest assholes I know. I fucking hate people. I really do. They are more unpredictable than wild animals. Sure there are some nice ones out there. (You bunch know who you are and I love ya) There are even some exceptional ones. But more often than not I seem to come across the real honest to goodness, shitty to the last drop motherfuckers that make you want to haul ass to some mountain top with a gun, never to come back and die happily alone. But I smile at strangers and let drivers in ahead of me in traffic.

So where the fuck did the damn courtesy go from the rest of the world? Is it too damn difficult to have a pleasant tone of voice? To open a fucking door? To move over a lane to let someone in on the highway safely?? I am so fucking sick and so fucking tired of rude, self-absorbed cocksuckers going about their business not giving a damn shit about the chaos they leave in their wake.

Years ago, I was sitting in my favourite pub with my friend Matt, and I'm sure I was off on a similar rant as I am now or maybe it was just conversation, who knows. But I do remember that he was jokingly making up political platforms on which I could run my campaign for Ruler of the World. The one that stuck best was 'Becky for Marshal Law'. And you can fucking well bet your last dollar that, that is how I would take care of this shitting rudeness problem we are faced with today! Just me and my private army wiping out the fuckwits left, right and centre. I foolishly wish for simpler times really, I suppose. I am well aware that the 1950's have come and gone but dammit they knew how to be fucking polite!!

I have completely had my fill of dickheads and douchebags.

I know the grown-up thing to do is to continue being courteous and let the jackwads be jackwads but just once I would like to have a perfect Hollywood scripted moment in putting those fuckfaces straight with a glorious standing ovation from the surrounding bystanders at the end. Just once...

Say YES to courtesy!! Fucker!

An Alcoholic miracle

I bought a bottle of rum.
The cashier placed that bottle in a paper bag.
I then placed it in the trunk of my car.
After I got home and parked, I popped the trunk before I exited the vehicle and heard a disturbing and LOUD noise.
I went to the rear of the car to find that the rum had fallen from the trunk when I opened it!
My heart sank! Hot tears of frustration were at the ready!
I picked up what I thought would be the remains of my fallen buddy Bacardi only to find the bottle still intact!!
Hallelujah!! An alcoholic miracle! God be praised!!

Say YES to keeping the faith! 

Poetry Wednesday

The Kid really likes this guy, Shel Silverstein.

Happy Wednesday!

Say YES to hugs!

Good ole catch 22

Damned if I do, damned if I don't...

I want you to envision life as an everyday street in your neighbourhood. For most, traveling from one end of the street to the other is relatively easy to do. There might be a few potholes, stop signs or detours along the way but hopefully no roadblocks. Now imagine there is a sewer opening in your road with no cover on it and it's clearly marked with caution tape. For most if there was a sewer opening in your road without a cover and it was clearly marked, you would avoid it. You would go around it. Jump over it. Or cross the street. I see the hole. I see the caution tape. And I fall in that hole every time. So I climb out of the hole, dust myself off and start walking only to fall down a hole again. The SAME hole. It's an awful cycle that I have yet to break. One day I will learn and cross the street.

But enough about the hole that is currently sucking the awesome from me. Let's partake of a better cycle...

There's me in the background falling into my hole around 1:14.....

Say YES to breaking the cycle.

Mental stinking Monday

It's official. I hate Monday group. I missed three weeks of group and upon returning to group this week thought that maybe it had gotten on track and we would be doing some 'real' work. I arrived late only to encounter the same annoying whining about life that had been going on in past weeks. It took much restraint to keep my mouth shut and just listen about the terrible victimization of all the poor helpless women in the group. I'm angry just thinking about it now. Stupid whiny shitheads!

Today was one annoying moment after another.

Woke up late. Which means the Kid woke up late. Which means the Kid was late for school. Which means that I didn't get to the gym. Then the Kid forgot her lunch which made me late for group. Then group sucked balls which made me angry. Then I tried to go fishing but that sucked too which sent me into a tiny rage. And of course it seemed that everyone driving today was a complete moron which sent me into an actual rage. Thank God for rum!!! Dear Bacardi, I love you.

I am ridiculously annoyed today about several other things and people. To the point where I no longer want to associate with those people.

But I shall endure....

However to convey the mood I am in, I will share a picture I took yesterday while out shopping with my friend Tdot......

Don't fuck with me today.

The Kid took the laptop! Not my fault!! True story.

I missed another one. My bad. But seriously the Kid took her laptop with her when she was visiting her dad this weekend. So I was left helpless...

Today was a Super Sunday! No not because it was Father's Day, (My 'father', if still alive, should do the world a favour and drop dead. But that's for another day...) but because it was 'Celebrate How Awesome my friend Tdot is!!' She is a brave, smart lady that after two years of hard college work has graduated and entered the work force and is kickin ass and taking names. I am very proud of her. So today we went and had a lovely brunch at the outdoor patio of Queenston Heights restaurant that is located on the Niagara escarpment. Delicious food, a beautiful view and great company. We took a nice drive and did some shopping. It was a simple pleasures kind of day.

I got to spend time with another special friend who is very dear to me.

I got some new plant friends and they got re-potted today.

I also tried to reach out to another friend but I'm afraid that really didn't go over so well. You can't win them all, I guess.

I used to think that it would be wonderful to be wildly popular and have a ton of friends. But now that I have become my own best friend I am so thankful for the handful of quality friends that I have been blessed with...unless it's money, quality really is better than quantity.

It is in the company

of a good friend

that the heart

finds a home.

Say YES to celebrating friendship!